Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize