We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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