Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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