So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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