Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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