the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize