Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
