No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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