You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
