That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Randomize
