u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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