i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
