I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
