He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
