Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
You were trust falling into bushes
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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