mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
My life is pants optional.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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