No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
