I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
he told me I talked like a deaf person
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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