He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
