Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
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