I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
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