I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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