he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
