cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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