...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
