I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Randomize
