Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
