maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Randomize
