whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
