BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
