No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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