i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
