Kiss
Puke
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
