Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I wish you could order shots online.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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