a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize