I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
God I need to hump something, right now.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
