belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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