Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize
