do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
