He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
