Well apparently he's into motor boating.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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