Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
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