Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
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