mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
