Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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