and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
