I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
