i just had sex bonerless
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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