i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I will die if light touches me.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
