Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
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