then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
